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Questions Answered:
- These past months I have been confronted with the many areas of my life where I have been controlling. It has not been pretty to see and even less pretty to navigate. I feel so much freedom when I catch myself wanting to control (I can feel my mind kick in and the fear in my gut which is obviously why I have been controlling) and just let it go, tell myself it’s ok and speak something positive that just neutralises it. But this does not always happen. Is my catching myself the only way to keep working through this or are there other things that I can be doing to help with this? I sometimes feel so overwhelmed at how much I have been controlling and get disheartened that I will be able to stop doing it.
- I have long had a issue in my life with anxiety and lately it has become larger and has started to feel overwhelming. I have used a range of tools to try to reduce and hopefully eliminate my fears, including chanting ‘I am safe,’ chanting Your name, chanting ‘I am love’ in an effort to distract and re-direct my mind, and I also reassure my inner-child that we are OK. I have also affirmed that the fears are not real. While these tools have worked to a degree, the anxiety persists and has become a daily part of my life. The fears mostly seem to have been around getting into trouble (from parents, partners, boss, etc.), combined with a fear of making mistakes and getting into trouble for that. It was suggested by someone close to me, that when the anxiety/fear comes up, to reassure myself of the truth that no-one is yelling at me right now, I am not in trouble, and that If I make a mistake it is ok. It was also suggested that up until now, I have not wanted to change this pattern and that I have been comfortable in my discomfort and not wanted to step out of it and be responsible for my life, my feelings and my healing. Up until now, this has been true and I now feel that I am ready and willing to change and to take responsibility and step up. I have just implemented the suggestion made to reassure myself about not being in trouble and that no one is yelling at me, etc., and it has been very effective in reducing the anxiety. Louix, is this the most effective way for me to address this issue and are their other things that I should be doing/not doing or addressing with myself? I am very grateful for any guidance you could give me.